> START OF ACT 2

> BAM!

AS: cmon dude we got session to start stop being cringe and get moving

MD: JESUS FUCK DANI WHATTAHELL D’YOU DO THAT FOR?

AS: i wanna speedrun this shit dude

MD: YOU COULDA TOLD ME THAT YA FUCKER

> SPEEDRUN TIME!!

MD:WHAT THE FUCK MAN

AS: dude im on xgamez mode

> DOO DO DO DO

MD: OH MY GOD WHATTHE FUCK DANI!!

> Faster...

AS: my turn

> FASTER.

AS: cmon cmon cmon

> FASTER!!!!!

AS: it’s loading....

MD: DANI ANSWER ME

AS: WHAT

MD: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU ON-

> WHAT THE FUCK DUDE.

AS: MY RAM WHAT THE FUCK DUDE UNPOGGERZ >:[

> Wait, Wait. Go Back A Second.

> You're Getting A Message!

-- starcrossedLeviathan [SL] began trolling makarovDelta [MD] --

SL: hello hUman isla iT has now come To mY aTTenTion ThaT YoU are a hUman ThaT can kelp me oUT of This liTTle whale

SL: siTUaTion im in iTs a liTTle sTickY

SL: so whaT do YoU saY will YoU kelp me

MD: Hello?

MD: I set my account to private, how’d you message me?

MD: Listen I know you might be a fan but I’d appreciate it if you respected my boundaries, I don’t know you and you don’t honestly know me, and I need you to know this

SL: This reelY is The firsT Time someone hasnT recognized me immediaTelY wow okaY i can definiTelY work wiTh This i can reelY work well wiTh This

SL: YoU know if YoU ever had a momenT of Time YoU were ever free we cod go on a nice vacaTion and i cod show YoU some Troll roYalTY

SL: if YoU caTch The kelp im casTing oUT There

SL: =)

MD: What the fuck

MD: Do you not know who I am?

MD: Also troll? Is that what they call tumblr users now?

SL: i donT know whaT TUmblr is bUT i know YoU bUT onlY kind of

SL: is TUmblr some sorT of hUman delicacY? iT does inTeresT me To learn aboUT new Things ive never reelY goT To see mUch do YoU Think iTs somefin poor Trolls woUld have becaUse Then i woUld be reelY reelY inTeresTed

SL: like Troll coffee

SL: do YoU have hUman coffee? is ThaT a fin hUmans carrY

MD: Oh yeah we have coffee, we have a few different kinds actually usually take mine black but it’s really up in the air some days, you?

SL: ive never had a hUman coffee iT looks odd and iTs black i ThoUghT iT was sUpposed To be green i UsUallY Take mine green

MD: Like matcha? I can get behind that, human coffee is usually different shades of brown, sometimes tea can be different colours its like leaf coffee

SL: hm This is verY inTeresTing i did noT know hUmans were capable of so mUch TechnologY

MD: Wait till I tell you about the godamn cyber truck

SL: a who

MD: it’s basically supposed to be this high tech mode of transportation made by this big rich guy, it’s a triangle dude literally a triangle

SL: i will noTe ThaT down

SL: Triangle TransporTaTion ThaT is qUiTe a discoverY

SL: one daY i will hope To ride in a Triangle TransporTaTion in order To fUllY experience whaT iT woUld be like To be a hUman living on earTh

SL: Thank YoU for This enlighTening experience

SL: YoU know i sTill casT oUT ThaT offer if YoUd like To biTe on mY sTring

SL: =)

SL: a liTTle biT of acqUainTance via relaTions woUld be a verY fin place To sTarT

MD: That sounds cool, ever heard of a hooters?

SL: a hooTer? isnT ThaT some sorT of noise

MD: Oh my god, no it’s great they have terrible food but like the waitresses are super hot and have big boobs, ergo “hooters” is more of an expression advertising the women who typically work in the establishment

SL: i woUld definiTelY woop a “hooTer” noise!

MD: You’re funny i like you

MD: You’re my friend now

SL: okay

SL: =)

MD: I’m going to warn you I am verbally abusive

MD: I don’t mean it usually

MD: Usually

MD: So sorry in advance

SL: i do noT mind a liTTle biT of forwardness in a relaTionship

SL: however i will remind YoU ThaT mY qUadranTs are qUiTe filled in The piTch qUarTer

SL: acTUallY ThaT does remind me of mY original plans To speak wiTh YoU hUman isla even ThoUgh we did manage To geT off Topic

MD: You can just call me Isla

SL: okaY hUman isla!

SL: YoU sea i am in a predicamenT wiTh some of mY oTher aqUainTances

SL: fronds if YoU woUld like To geT a liTTle more specific

SL: i need YoUr kelp in facT i need The kelp from all of YoUr fronds YoU have especiallY since The loT of YoU are qUiTe adorable bUT alas mY qUadranTs woUld be Too fUll To have all of YoU

SL: =(

MD: I don’t know what a quadrant is

MD: Also I literally collect teeth in a jar

MD: Dont call me adorable

MD: Uh, please?

SL: i will Think of oTher adjecTives ThaT are more sUiTing if iTs whaT YoU please

SL: anYwaves i need kelp

SL: all of Us need anY kelp we can geT in facT

MD: Sorry dude, I live in New York there isn’t a lot of kelp for a while

SL: whaT

SL: whaTever do YoU know The game YoUre plaYing?

MD: Uh yeah, Sburb right?

SL: i wenT Through ThaT Too in facT all of my Team did and iT was an absolUTe clUsTerfUck

SL: a shiTshow if YoU will

SL: were Trapped and weve been Trapped for daYs and were rUnning oUT of Time

SL: i donT know how i donT UndersTand whY buT i can conTacT YoU and YoUr fronds and i know iTs desTinY and i know iTs faTe ThaT YoU kelp us and in reTUrn i can get YoU ThroUgh This game

SL: desTinY and faTe are big words YoU know and TheY mean a loT To me

SL: iT feels like faTe ThaT i goT To speak To YoU a beaUTifUl hUman

SL: =)

MD: Pushin it close with that one there bud

MD: Anyways, how can I do anything about it?

SL: geT ThroUgh The game wiTh oUr kelp and save Us please

SL: and i donT know how or if iT cod happen bUT donT leT konrak geT near YoU

SL: jUsT TrUsT me on ThaT mY love

MD: No

MD: Konrak? Is that like a disease or some shit

SL: shes mY verY sexY fishmesis

SL: =)

MD: Was she the one who normalized abuse to you?

SL: Yes bUT shes sUpposed to do ThaT

MD: Honey no

MD: That’s not healthy

SL: jUsT lisTen okaY we donT need to debaiT aboaT mY relaTionships here im alreadY working on iT iTs a roUgh sUbjecT

SL: follow mY insTrUctions and we shoUld be okaY